For some you may just scroll through this post without a second thought, but for a lot of others I know you will most likely share some of my thoughts and feelings. It’s taken a long time for me to finish this off, I don’t like to come across as a ranter or complainer, but I guess I’ve now reached a point where somethings got to give.
Since beginning my blog 7 years ago, I have had so many incredible opportunities come my way. I have met some really amazing people and worked alongside creatives who are extremely passionate about what they have to offer the world. I truly am beyond grateful for all of this, but like everything in life it hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows. In the last 18months especially, I have placed so much unnecessary pressure on myself that isn’t helping anyone.
The whole reason I began my social accounts was to share my love of an industry I am super passionate about, to show that when you love what you do, and work hard to achieve your dreams, life can be so rewarding - and honestly every stressful day has been so worth it. But I guess I have also kind of hidden the other side to it that has began effecting me a lot as of late, and it’s taking a huge toll on the clarity of my mind.
I have tried my best to remain stern in my beliefs, I’m a pretty positive person but my one downfall is I care too much and if you have followed me for a while, then you will know im a bit of a lone surviver in the social world so to speak. I’m not a follower of trends, I’m not someone who looks at aligning with certain people for how they will benefit me, and most of all I have always remained really strong in not letting numbers rule my life as I think it’s really unhealthy to live that way.
But lately I’ve felt a lot of hate towards a platform I use to absolutely adore. Adding that extra stress to already running a really demanding business, which is my main focus - I guess you would say it’s become all a bit much. So it’s time for me to pull in the reigns and focus on real life things for now, the things that really make my soul happy.
I know with the times things change, but I just think theres alot of bullshit online these days, everything appears so easy and quite frankly it’s messing with my ability to continue my love of sharing online. One thing I have found there to be is so much falseness around what being “successful” really looks like, and the pressures that having your life figured out by the time you finish school is having on our younger generation.
Suddenly every tom dick and harry is a “successful business owner” after doing an online course or because they get X amount of likes. Even lately you would have noticed, it’s chats about engagement everywhere. Which yes are important, but im seeing it all the time! People are just so desperate for that comment or like just to be seen, and it’s just something I can’t deal with anymore.The need for validation and the loss of love and passion in people, has really got me fired up and I know it’s most likely only going to get worse before it gets better.
Instead of supporting just the pretty girls who look like models because you want them to reply to your comments, or the ones seen as local “celebs” we should be supporting and celebrating all people. Some of the people I look up to most are the Mums online who are stressed AF, have been through some really unfair and tough times with kids nagging at them 24/7. But some how they still wake up everyday, go to work and get shit done without social media crediting them. Where are their 10,000 followers, because they sure as hell deserve them.
So why is it that everything always comes back to the riches vs what feels like the rags? I guess this is where I have felt really stuck lately, I feel like I’m against the grain so much. I’m just your average looking 26 year old, with normal friends, a business that wasn’t an overnight success story but more of a 6 year plan. A life that unfiltered or filtered is what it is, with no other goal but to add value to lives where I can - whether thats through my use of a makeup brush, or a gentle smile.
There is so much behind a life online that I think goes un talked about, and so many feelings like mine that are left bottled up for fear of what others may think. Free products and hanging out at fancy events with well known peers, is not always what it’s cracked up to be, and I know so many content creators that avoid events for the anxiety even walking into the room gives them.
During my online career I have been bullied by people who had never even met me, had relationships where some will be your friend one moment, then the next they are ripping off your content to claim as their own, or suddenly your just not cool enough - even strangers name dropping me to get sent product all for the thought of “being known” . It’s honestly such a crazy world out there, and I so wish it was like the old days, where people genuinely had no other motive behind sharing their story’s, but to be kind and connect with others.
So before I pull things back and become a little quieter on your feeds for the next little while, I want you to take a really good look at how you are using social media and how much it’s taking over your life. I would love to see it return to a place where struggles are shared not for likes, but for more of a me too movement. That bad days and off weeks are seen as normal for everyone, and all lives are celebrated and supported because behind all of our screens, we are the same.
So theres a little update on where I’m at, she’s been a hell of a ride so far. I will still be using Instagram to connect and share especially on stories, but it will be a lot less than normal daily postings. Just while i unplug and focus on things beyond the squares. Because one day Instagram may no longer be around and all i wish is to exist in lives far beyond that. I hope you all understand. x